Something New
by Grasshopper
Summary: //No True Pair, Tieria x Hilling// Theirs is not a marriage that would eventually lead to love. They’d be lucky to consummate it without killing one another first.


**Title:** Something New  
**Author:** Grasshopper (A.K.A. The Undertaker's Muse)  
**Rated:** R(-ish? Probably overrating, as always, but best to be safe.)  
**Warnings:** Het, not-exactly-romantic, AU thing. Fly-by mention of Tieria's not-quite-heterosexuality. Crack. Or maybe not. (It's hard to tell when you mix these two.) Nudity and sexual overtones, but nothing really graphic. Mention of canonical crossdressing.  
**Fandom:** Gundam 00  
**Challenge:** No True Pair  
**Prompt:** Hilling Care and Tieria Erde are in a marriage of convenience  
**Spoilers:** Up to 02x20, _Anew Returner_. Sort of. The crew knows of Anew's past, but she's still with them.  
**Pairings:** Tieria Erde x Hilling Care  
**Summary:** Theirs is not a marriage that would eventually lead to love. They'd be lucky to consummate it without killing one another first.  
**Author's Notes:** WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN- Tieria with actual boy parts? What kind of fuckery is this? *sighs* This pairing amuses me, if for no other reason than that I prefer Tieria with Hilling's "brother," Ribbons. And there's so much backstory here that I ignored in favor of snark. Like just **why** exactly there has to be a wedding. Truth be told, part of the idea came from a wedding prompt on the S2 Kink Meme.  
**Disclaimer:** All things _Gundam 00_ belong to Sunrise and Bandai, with major props to Kouga Yun-sensei for the beautiful character designs. Grassy only lays claim to the plot.

* * *

"This is so~ unfair! I can't believe Ribbons ordered me to marry **you**." Hilling's short green curls lost their decorative combs and clips as the girl flung them violently upon the vanity. She glared at the **other**'s - her **husband**'s - reflection.

"I'm not precisely exultant over the arrangement, myself, Hilling Care."

"Oh, shut the hell up, Ti-e-ri-a Er-de," Hilling drawled mockingly.

Tieria's lips pressed even more firmly into a scowl. He'd done this for peace. For **peace**. Hilling was the only female type available (other than Anew, who was one of **them** and didn't count) so there was every need to restrain himself from **wringing the shrew's neck**.

"And really! Why did **I** have to be the bride? History **proves** that I look better in a tux and you a dress. So~ humiliating..."

Tieria ignored the taunt. He'd heard it often enough from Lyle Dylandy and Lyle hadn't even **seen** Tieria's disguise for the A-LAWS party.

Hilling smiled, bright and more than a little unhinged, standing before Tieria in nothing but her violet-trimmed, lacy white undergarments. Her chest wasn't much different from his own, merely softer-looking with hints of curves enhanced by the lingerie upon her person. Although the patch of pale green curls that marked the vee of her legs - and why, ribbon and lace bedecked as she was otherwise, was she **not wearing panties** - made visible the difference between Hilling's physiology and that of those Tieria had coupled with previously.

"If you keep thinking too much I'm going to get even **more** bored than I am, now."

The tone of the words matched the faux innocence that decorated her features. But Tieria took it as the threat it was.

Carefully, mechanically, he began to disrobe; painstakingly folding and storing each item of clothing away as necessary. It made for a sharp contrast with the wedding dress Hilling had tossed carelessly into a corner of the room. Once he was nude - despite his lack of body shyness, Tieria found himself wishing for **some** type of covering - Tieria met his new wife's challenging gaze steadily.

"Wow, you really are identical to Regene! Let's just hope you know how to use **this**," Tieria jumped as one small hand grasped his penis firmly, "properly."

"And if I don't?" Not that Tieria doubted his bedroom skills - despite his very high standards and lack of practical experience with women, it was one of the areas covered in his training - but who knew what kind of tastes Hilling had. She was the sister of **Ribbons Almark** after all.

Hilling's grin showed entirely too many teeth for Tieria's comfort.

"Then we do this my way, of course."

"Of course," he murmured, not even **daring** to contemplate.

So he didn't resist as she pushed him down upon the bed. And when she made the first move, he made the second. When she caused him to shout, he made sure that she **screamed**.

After all, Tieria had never been a pushover. And he **hated** to lose a challenge.

* * *

**The End**


End file.
